Actually, that’s not a question. Stop bitching and either get yourself one of our travel-sized soaps or build yourself a new soap holder, son.
To be honest with you, Duke Cannon would rather take a swift kick to the junk than spend all day on a computer. So he hired an intern to handle all this new age nonsense.
- EMAIL: INTERN1@DUKECANNON.COM
- PHONE: (855) 354-4438 (M-F 9-4 CST)
- INTERESTED WHOLESALERS, EMAIL: WHOLESALE@DUKECANNON.COM
Before you waste your time and ours with simple questions, check out the FAQs.
Take your knife out and cut yourself a crack-slice. Or buy one of our travel-sized soaps. Specifically engineered for smaller cracks.
All Natural Tallow Soap Base, Coconut Oil, Water, Hard Work, Fragrance, and Steel Cut Oats
This is America. We don’t skip any steps here. Each brick of soap is individually packaged and hand stamped.
They are not specifically formulated for any type of skin. The inclusions may be abrasive if your skin is incredibly sensitive. For a full list of ingredients, please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org
Duke Cannon products are available in over 5000 stores around the country. If you need help finding one near you, please email us. Our goods are also sold through our online store if you're feeling lazy and don't like field trips.
For the fastest answers, please directly contact our shipping department at email@example.com
The soap smells like a man should – clean and fresh. Trust us, the ladies in the office think it’s a manly scent.
It will certainly help, yes.
Son, you have us confused with a popular brand of shower gels. Their “effect” promises greater attention from “eager and attractive young females.” And if you believe that load of BS, you are a complete d-bag. Please leave our site now. Our soap gets you clean, not laid. You should be able to take care of that yourself.
He is the man you wish you were.